So many coincidence and serendipitous events come together to bless us once we have committed to a decision. From the moment I committed (last year) to walk the Camino to Santiago de Compostela, events, people and opportunities have conspired to help make it happen.
Unexpected paths appear, doors open, the universe smiles down on us when we open our eyes and ears and pay attention.
I never seem to have the patience to get the magic down on paper, but I know that every step of my upcoming camino adventure has been blessed in ways I could not have outlined. And I know that I am grateful for this continuing lesson of what supply and substance (or should I say Supply and Substance?) is really about.
I used to like to write – to wordsmith and edit till my message was clear and concise. The past few years though, I have become more of a vehicle for stream of consciousness writing…letting my feelings guide my fingers, letting my heart show. My life is so full and busy, there is no time (or patience) …I am living like a stream rushing with the floodtide of spring melt…thoughts and feeling splash and tumble over the rocks with no decorum or linear path…just enthusiasm, power, joy and playfulness.
Living my life is a bit like that too.
Somewhere along the line I stopped orchestrating and outlining and simply began living. I respond rather than react… In the moment between stimulus and response I make a choice; a choice consistent with my values. And then I respond. I commit.
Because I am better at staying in the moment I have become more practiced at dealing with the suggestions that ambiguity is bad. I am freed from fear (and ambivalence and rigid thinking and decisions and actions based on control, etc).
So now, in April, I embark (officially) on this Pilgrimage of Gratitude, this 800 kilometer walk across Spain, and I prepare knowing that all will be well. That does not mean I am passive, but it means I am capable of weathering the challenges ahead and wise enough to find the blessings on my rocky path. A line from a favorite hymn of my mother’s (and mine): “I will follow and rejoice, all the rugged way.” The path may literally and metaphorically be challenging, but I will be singing, dancing and rejoicing in the face of it all…alive and well.
I am not a novice at living. The path has been rugged at time. Dealing with the loss of a son, walking through cancer and watching a special dream die…these experiences have blessed me in so many ways. I have grown and learned and I am free from many constraints and mortal concerns.
Well, I started this post, hoping to share some of the delightful coincidences that have lead to each decision of my preparations for my camino, but I have digressed (as in life, the detours often make the story more compelling). Typical of me, I have taken the longer route, the inviting detour that meanders; the path that many avoid. As someone once said, life is about the journey and not the destination. Looking back at my life, I have no regrets, just a calm, sense of gratitude, peace, content, strength…I am happy in my own skin. I am open and willing to learn more. The adventure continues as I amble down the path.
Perhaps another day I will attempt to share the stories I thought I would share today.
Today, I shared a little more of who I am. Welcome to my world…
Life is good…
At Last: A Stone for Denise
6 days ago